Being a Cowboys Fan Sucks Ass
(Photo taken by me)
The Cowboys did the damn thing again. They made it look like they were going to be a competent team and win a big game, but then choked harder than your favorite pornstar.
I’m a god damn idiot for thinking that we were actually going to beat Tom Brady’s Bucs for an entire half of football. It also makes too much sense that the game clenching play was a missed penalty on Chris Godwin.
I’ve witnessed games like this my entire life. There’s a lot of back and forth in the first three quarters, we take a big lead late in the 4th, and then we shit the bed.
Yes, each of those links are chokes from over the years.
A nearly identical game happened during week 1 last year, when the Cowboys offense got stopped after a bad offensive PI call occurred after Jalen Ramsey gave the Oscar performance of this generation.
Dak Prescott is essentially Tony Romo reincarnated at this point, doomed by shit defense and bad luck. Being a Boys fan born in 98 has been been a cycle of despair and it's my cross to bear.
Do you know what the worst part is? I have to rely on glory days of the past that I’ve never been a part of. Highlight reels of guys like Roger Staubach, Emmit Smith, and Jimmy Johnson yelling “how bout dem cowboys!” It gets me going every time, and it makes me proud (like a fucking oaf) rooting for them.
(Photo taken by me)
But that’s pretty much all I have. Instead of championship parades, I get to look at the sack of bones and botox that is Jerry Jones talk about how he would fucking murder somebody just to win another Super Bowl. I get to watch our star players either get in trouble or flame out of the league. I get to watch the star helmet fucking choke AGAIN like we did Thursday night.
I know all you Cowboys haters are probably love reading this, but to hell with y’all. Hope you people know that your hate means nothing to us. We were born in it, molded by it.
And you know what? This shit is hard work, Cowboys fans don’t get enough credit for being loyal, real fans for putting up with the bullshit we have in the past 20 years. And you know what else? Fuck you guys, we’re winning the Super Bowl.